The Girl Who Ate Everything

"You're in good health."

"Really?"

"You're surprised?"

"Hm...I ate a lot of crap this year."

"Well, you did gain 28 pounds since your last visit."

Yesterday I went to my pediatrician's office (yeah, yeah, I'm 20) for a checkup in order to get my study abroad medical forms filled out. As I'm not fond of most medical practitioners, I hadn't been there in three years since the last time I had to go was to get into college. During that period I was at my skinniest (not that I was actually "skinny") post-puberty, while right now as my bum exerts pressure on this padded seat, I'm at my highest weight...ever.

Everrrrr.

Everrrrr.

...Oh well. I'm rather surprised that this isn't bothering me more (although, of course, I'm wondering how to lose some weight without cutting off any appendages). During sophomore year (as in, my first year as a transfer student studying food at NYU), I wanted to switch my major because I thought I couldn't handle the stress that food gave me. It sounds ridiculous now, but I actually went through the trouble (as in, I exerted this thing called "effort") of seeing an advisor in the communications department and getting a form to change my major until I realized...there wasn't much point. I was halfway through the food studies program; I may as well finish it.

And of course, today I eat everything without much guilt. That may or may not be a good thing. It's probably not a good thing.

On a related note, there's an article about being afraid of food at Skinny Daily Post:

There are much sadder things in the world, but really, really, really, we should not be afraid of food.

If we're afraid of it, that means it's still in charge. We give food the power. And then we can't enjoy its company any more. Can't enjoy all the good traditions and associations that is food's rightful place. Can't enjoy it as nourishment, as celebration, as communion. As gift.

It's important to keep those ideas in mind if you ever become afraid of food (although if you're reading this blog, I doubt you'll ever be in that situation). It's hard to avoid something you're afraid of if you kind of need it to live and if everyone else seems to be having a good time with it. When I dieted, I ignored the communal aspect of food. Don't do that; it's moronic.

As for communal eating, WHO WANTS TO MAKE A FOOD MOB!? Okay, not a large mob. A few people would like to meet up after Kitchen Secrets on June 21st. I'd rather meet beforehand, but it may be tough to squeeze in something after people get out of work. Hohum. Anyway, feel free to think about where to eat and whether or not you're that interested in meeting me. I WOULDN'T, HAR HAR.

oh my god, it's the sky!...wait, it's always there

On that note, I had a lovely time sitting in this beautiful outdoor park thing at the Hudson Hotel for Sam's NYC food blogger meet up. As we walked through the posh hotel lobby around to the park and saw a huge table of people-who-looked-like-food-bloggers, I turned to John and said, "Crap, I'm really late!...crap, I don't know how to socialize!" When we got to the table, I stood there awkwardly due to a brain blackout. A few seconds later, Meg came by and asked me if I knew where the food bloggers were. Do I give off a food blogger aura? If so, that's kind of cool!...unless the aura is a weird odor, in which case it's not so cool..

John and I swiped chairs from another table and plopped ourselves down at the end of the table. Since I'm a douche, I didn't meet everyone, especially those sitting mere feet away from me at the other end of the table. Ye know, it's just so hard to stand up and say hello. (Actually, this is very difficult for me to do.) ...Yes, me fail socialization. Here's a list of the people who were there (besides Sam and Fred!):

The Wednesday Chef, A Chicken in Every Granny Cart, אין מױל ארײן, A Finger in Every Pie, The Amateur Gourmet (plus his friend, Craig), The Food Section (plus his wife who runs Celebrity Babies and their baby daughter), Megnut, Prepare to Meet Your Bakerina, and Cookin' in the Cuse.

fooood!

Sam provided us with caloric dense treats and espressed worry over my lack of access to the sugar due to my location at the end of the table. Aw! :) Of course, I did end up eating a fair share of things, like two caramels, four (or five?) truffles, and a chocolate covered caramel shortbread cookie sandwich. Best dinner ever? Yes! Unless you're diabetic.

I mainly chatted with Craig ("Friend of a Food Blogger"), Josh, Danielle, John (my FoaFB) and of course, Sam! I didn't talk to Josh's and Danielle's baby daughter, Anya, but she spoke to the rest of us in the form of high-pitched elated gleefulness. ;) Aww....babiiiess...they're so freakin' happy. If you ever feel as sad as a skinny, wet, abandoned cat in a ditch who just evaded being run over by a truck, remember at that some point you were a cute, smiling baby and that everyone loved you. Even if they don't anymore.

....

Anyway! I'm bad at socializing. Considering how infrequently I do it, it's not a surprise. You know how college is supposed the time when people meet other people and do...stuff? I missed that memo. I have no problem meeting people one-on-one, but group situations are much more awkward for me. Unless I'm absolutely sure otherwise, my assumption is that no one really wants to talk to me. Also, I'm rarely one to approach others as another one of my assumptions is that I bother people. I'm not sure how I got into this mindset, but it's been there for years and won't come out, no matter how hard I scrub. [scrub scrub]

Maybe it'll just fade with time.

Thanks so much to Sam (HAPPYBIRTHDAYHAPPYBIRTHDAY!) for inviting me and organizing the get-together in such a funky hotel. Seriously, when we walked in it felt like...the future. In case anyone is wondering, the future has fluorescent green escalators and attractive waitresses who wear revealing clothing. Whoa! Okay.

Oh, food! I didn't forget...

the cupcake is miiiine

I met John at Burgers & Cupcakes for a day of Robyn-fooding. Since I wasn't very hungry, I just ate this cupcake. It's not nutritionally balanced, but neither am I! We're like twins, except I don't have a smooth lump of pink frosting on my head, nor am I made of soft vanilla butter cake. Also, I'm human, so being twins is biologically impossible. I hope.

The cupcake tasted fresh and inoffensive: not too sweet/unsweet, not too dry/moist. It sits at the nucleus of a cupcake...amoeba.

...That didn't make sense. I just wanted to say "nucleus" and "amoeba". Once you stop taking science classes, there really aren't enough opportunities to use those words.

salmon burger

John gave thumbs up to his salmon burger.

EAT MEAT, SUCKAZ!

I guess that guy would too.

holy moly

A hop on the 1 train brought us to Levain Bakery, also known as the Gateway to Cookie Heaven. As each cookie weighs 6 ounces and resembles a small boulder, this is not something you should eat by yourself. John and I shared a freshly baked chocolate chip walnut cookie (my favorite kind out of the four choices) whose cookie dough consistency spilled with melted, gooey chocolate chipness as I ripped off chunk after chunk. Shoving the warm pieces into our mouths a little faster that what's appropriate to sustain a comfortable digestive system resulted in fleeting cookie happiness. It was freakin' was awesome. I bought a few extra cookies to give to other friends.

After securing the cookie gifts, we stopped into Alice's Tea Cup about a block away where I bought a mini strawberry chocolate scone to eat later. We went back on the train to City Bakery so I could pick up a few more cookie gifts. And then...back on the train to go to Jacques Torres where I switched from cookie gifts to chocolate gifts.

I think we're gonna need more coffee

Although I work about a block away from Porto Rico, my lack of coffee interest must have caused my eyes to glaze over every time I walked by it. This place had so many open sacks of coffee beans that I could taste a film of coffee in every crevice of my mouth just from breathing the store's fumes. Jeebus. Oh, and it smelled a lot like coffee too. I bought a 1 pound bag as a gift for Morten (although since my mum thinks I should get more, I'm going back there today), a bag that will make everything in my suitcase smell like coffee when I get to Norway. If you like coffee, you'll definitely find something you like in this store. Or you can just stand there and get high from the coffee fumes. If you go on a Sunday afternoon, you will be smelling them for a looooong time as you wait in line to place your order.

And that's it. But wait! I got a new toy this weekend that will enhance your future blog reading experiences:

it's Bert!

Okay, it's not my brother standing in our yellow kitchen that will enhance your experience, but my NEW CAMERA that took this photo! That's right kiddies, I now have one of those digital SLR things that I'm not qualified to use. So far my photos are extremely unextraordinary (which I guess makes them...ordinary), but I'm working on it.

trees

That's part of my nonexistent backyard (plus my brother's friend's car in the driveway) that has been taken over by trees (actually I guess it's humans that have taken over the forest...but anyway). When people ask me if living in the city causes me to miss tree and other lovely natural things, I look at them quizzically and reply, "...No."

Ah, I'm going to Norway tomorrow! Fancy that.

RANDOM ADDENDUM!!!

NYC-ers, please help John find a place to live! OR ELSE HE'LL...LIVE IN A BOX. Okay, he won't ever get to that point, but he seriously needs an affordable place to live or else he's doomed. He's looking for places, but I figure I can reach a few trustworthy NYC-ers through this blog. If you or anyone you know has a cheap place to live around NYC available for rent/sublet/slave labor to a 38 year old guy (we realized this might be easier if he were a 20 year old girl, but time travel and sex changes can get tricky), contact me and I'll let him know. He's EXTREMELY cool, EXTREMELY harmless, and has the double platinum Robyn "seal of approval"! So. Yeah.