The Girl Who Ate Everything

...so I don’t really know how to explain why I’m suddenly eating EVERYTHING, mainly consisting of foods HIGH IN CALORIC DENSITY.

Unless it’s the product of immaculate conception. But I kind of doubt that. God’s sense of humor can only go so far before it crosses the line between “Haha, good one, chief!” and “Haha…um…am I allowed to laugh or are you going to strike me dead now?”

When I got home from a 1+ hour trek from Bensonhurst (not so bad, since Diana was also suffering with me, not that that really distributes the frustration but I’m sure dying with someone else is better than dying alone…unless it’s especially painful and you have to watch their face as it writhes in all sorts of unspeakable anguish), that part of my brain that decides it wants sweets seemed to attack the other parts that regulate the cravings for sweets and…

zomg

...I subsequently dug into the “package of good stuff” that Sean gave me more than a week ago. I’m rather surprised it lasted that long with me barely chipping away at it, but I was sick last weekend resulting in a decreased appetite. I opened the 22-piece box of See’s candies and have so far eaten three. Or four? ...Yeah, it was four, dammit. The creamy peanut filling (edit) brown sugar buttercream (how the hell did I think it was peanut butter?) was the least aggreeable, but the chopped-nut covered toffee was great, as was another creamy nut-filled (edit) brown sugar buttercream (OH GOD, why is everything tasting like nuts?!) one, and the marzipan was pretty good (HAHA, THAT ONE IS MADE OF NUTS, I win). I ate a few of the cookies in the bottom left of the photo when I happily realized, “Holy crap, I have COOKIES!” (I doubt the cookies were as happy as I was). I ate one and a half of the Ghirardelli chocolate squares (they’re rather small, so I tasted half of the mint one to realize I didn’t like it enough to eat the entire thing; however, the caramelized almond one was very nice) and finally finished off the Richart chocolate squares I bought a few weeks ago (I can’t believe how long those lasted either, as that whole pack only weighed 1.75 ounces).

foods!

From this food trade with Kristen (I received the package the same day as i received Seans, leading to “way too much junk food in my kitchen”), I ate one and a half of the pink frosted cookies. Why one and a half? My original craving for sugar only lasted one cookie; biting into the second made me realize I could really just go for a loaf of bread, or something sans-frosting. However, I thought I could eat two! I THOUGHT I HAD THE POWER. Limits do exist in the world of “Robyn’s appetite”.

assorted baklawa

Wei sent me a 3 pound package of mixed baklawa from Shatila. While I had done rather well eating one a day at the most, this afternoon I ate two of the "finger" pastries (flaky filo dough rolled around ground cashews). Dude, this stuff is really good. I was under the impression that everything would be really sweet, but they're actually not. They're just sweet enough and lightly flavored. I've never had these exact pastries before and it's a shame they're not easier to come across. I remember seeing Middle Eastern bakeries in Bay Ridge but I was just roaming around by myself one Friday afternoon and wasn't adventurous enough to buy anything.

But not enough, I suppose. Besides everything I’m mentioned so far that I’ve stuffed in my mouth, I ate a vegetable bun, two persimmons, some of those TLC crackers (which are quite good, but I doubt I’d eat again because I never crave crackers), some leftover noodles that Diana gave me from last night’s dinner, and a sacrificial goat.

Where did this sugar craving come from? There’s obviously some kind of imbalance; maybe I’m full of yeast. Yeast like sugar. WHERE’S THE YEAST?! OHHH JESUS. (looks around)...nope, not there.

I’m just imbalanced in more ways than one. Physically, sometimes I feel like I have a hormonal imbalance, unless I’m actually balanced and everyone else is at fault. Hey, it’s possible. Waait…(looks at calendar)...

GAGHARHGAmrhaahr (mumble), I think my period is coming. Well. I guess that’s a reasonable explanation. Would that explain why I had to pee so much this morning that part of my dream last night actually involved feeling like my bladder was going to explode (yeah, my dreams are really dull), hence why I woke up at 10-something AM on a Sunday morning when I would usually lay in my bed comatose until the little hand goes past 12?

I have to admit, I get very few warning signs during my period. My mood doesn’t change and I don’t get any particularly weird cravings (you know I want sweets most of time). It comes, it goes, and it sucks, but I suppose I’d still rather me female than male, and I would never take drugs to artificially get rid of my period.

This isn’t much of a confession, but while I was on the raw food diet, I actually lost my period for a while. A few months, rather. While some people would be alarmed, I didn’t care; damn, I was really happy. There was probably something wrong with my hormones to mess up my period like that, but I didn’t feel sick, I wasn’t anywhere near being underweight, and my body functions were otherwise normal. (I don’t think I fit the bill for anything on this list at least). Anyway, that’s never going to happen again so there’s no use in being concerned about it. I’d be more concerned about getting cramps during my period, which I had no idea was “normal” until when in my 12th grade psychology class we were making up guides of advice for young students (or something like that) and everyone in my group (of females) agreed that having painkillers on hand during your period was a necessity. Someone please agree with me in that it shouldn’t be a necessity. I'm sure there are some people who will always be in pain no matter what they do, but not everyone is physically predisposed to having these problems. If you get bad cramps during your period and think there may be a part of your lifestyle worth making healthier, perhaps you should look into it. Of course, if you don't mind taking extraneous drugs, then it doesn't matter. (I happen to mind. If you ever need a drug as basic as aspirin or a salve as simple as hand cream, I won't be able to give you anything. Here, have some DENTAL FLOSS.)

Anyway, I’ve argued about some pretty stupid health-related matters before, which isn’t what I want this blog to dissolve into.

Uh. I got tagged by Adam, so I’m going to do this thing before I confuse any more male readers.

Seven things to do before I die

1. Be in a band and release an album, or just release one as a solo artist. (I highly doubt this will happen.)
2. Visit Antarctica. For the penguins.
3. Visit Iceland. For the…um, Iceland.
4. Visit Australia. Just because. Not like I’ve been there yet.
5. I haven’t been to Vietnam either.
6. Write a really funny book. Non-fiction. Prose. (I highly doubt this will happen either.)
7. I have another one but it’s pretty basic if you’re young, so I won’t even mention it. ...Actually I may have to clarify that. Um. Uh. ...Nevermind. It's an emotional thing.

Seven things I cannot do

1. Lie. I’d feel really guilty.
2. Speak up in class.
3. Eat worms. Or any bug for that matter. (Knowingly.)
4. Get enough sleep every day.
5. Develop a taste for wine or coffee.
6. Lose 20 pounds (considering my current diet).
7. Comfortably perform music in front of anyone. (I played guitar and sang just once in front of my Japanese class for a project. Wanted. To. Die.)
8. Oh jeez, I'm adding another one: Believe in myself. How lame is that? That should probably be number one on this list.

Seven things that attract me to blogging

1. Meeting cool people who don’t seem to be turned off by my strangeness.
2. Keeping track of all the places I’ve been to that I feel are worth sharing with others.
3. Talking about random crap.
4. Maybe sharpen my writing skills (actually, it might do the opposite…but at the very least, I may type faster).
5. Finding like-minded people who eat a crapload of food just like me.
6. Having an excuse to take photos of everything, before i eat it, half eaten, and afterwards.
7. Getting an excuse to eat out more.

Seven things I say most often

1. Crap.
2. Poop.
3. Like.
4. Huh?
5. What?
6. Mmmm…[insert food of choice]
7. Jesus.

Seven books I love

1. Books by Barbara Park *
2. Books by Louis Sacher *
3. Books by Gordon Korman *
4. Books by Jeffrey Steingarten
5. Books by Bill Bryson
6. Books by Dave Barry
7. Don’t you all love “The Giver” by Lois Lowry? Good.

[* I haven’t books by these authors in ages, but they were my favorites during my childhood.]

Seven movies/DVDs that I watch over and over again

1. Arggh…I’m not much of a movie person. If I watch anything over and over again, I’ll get sick of it. I’ll just say any Miyazaki movie will probably make me happy, but really, I could only watch “Princess Mononoke” or “Spirited Away” so many times.