The Girl Who Ate Everything

All those years. The youthful heart. The carefree, reckless taste buds. You see, to saturate or unsaturate depends on one's taste. And my taste buds have gotten me into more trouble. And you don't want to think about what all those things are doing to your body. How many pieces of scrapple? How many hot dogs? Hot many peices of bacon? All those hoagies. All those steak sandwiches. Ice cream. man! I'm terrified. I'm in trouble. Because I suddenly realize that I am what I ate, and I'm frightened.

All that butter. And some of it was just casual. Casual. Sitting there. The butter was there. And the bread was there. So why not? Bread. With butter. It was casual. No harm. But there is no such thing as casual because it's on the side of my neck now.

Those are just some words of wisdom from Bill Cosby. Out of everyone who could give me a food-related book, I wouldn't have thought my brother would tap on my door and say, "Hey, have you read this book?" Do I read? No. Wait. Yes! Wait. I don't know. Yesterday my mum gave me a book about salt. WHAT A GREAT FAMILY I HAVE.

My Christmas was uneventful because we stopped doing the "presents" thing ages ago. At some point I realized that presents on Christmas was most important for people who needed a special occasion to get presents. In all honesty, I can get things I like...whenever. It's not just being spoiled, but...oh, I guess it is. God dammit.

I ate half a stick of butter. No no, not STRAIGHT, god, what kind of glutton do you think I am? Pshaaw. Uhm. I ate a lot of cookies. Oh, that's not any better you say? Yeah, you're right.

cookies?

Even though I halved this browned butter spritz recipe, I ended up with more than 4 dozen cookies. You know what happened to those cookies? IN MY BELLY. THE BUILDING BLOCKS OF ANOTHER SUBCUTANEOUS LAYER OF FAT. Or...CUTANEOUS LAYER OF FAT.

I ate other stuff, but do you really care? Cookies rule! These cookies would've ruled more if they had been covered in whipped cream or soaked in pudding, but you can't have it all if you want to not gain 10 pounds in your sleep.

I did eat a lot of these chocolates from Wegmans though...

bow to the chocolates

Crap. You could ask why I didn't get a smaller box--they didn't have any! I suppose the smaller boxes were snatched up by non-gluttonous people. The chocolates are good, but in my opinion they lost "something" compared to the older chocolates. The old ones weren't molded nor as colorful. I still like the new ones, but...I just don't know. However, the almond praline piece is one of the best things I have ever tasted. Ever. In my life. It was just that good. It might be annoying that I'm not actually describing this chocolate piece for you, but...really, what's the point? If you've had almond praline before, it tastes like that, but more almond praline-y.

And that concludes the worst food review ever.