The Girl Who Ate Everything

I've been sick for the past two days, yet that hasn't made even the smallest dent in my fooding habits. My eating has actually became less healthy. No, I'm not trying to destroy my body--I just really love to eat baked things. Damn conniving bundles of wheat and fat and sugar and sinful deliciousness and--

OH MY GOD, COOKIES!!!

plates of cookies, oh my

Carol and I went to Milk and Cookies, a place I could hardly believe I had unknowingly passed by countless times (my bakery radar is obviously defective), to eat some ...um, guess! No, not honey glazed roast pork, but COOKIES!

outside Milk & Cookies

Nested away on the tiny Commerce Street, this place probably doesn't get much foot traffic. That would be a shame, as it's a cute, homey place to hang out in, until midnight on Fridays and Saturdays if you so desire. Spending a night cavorting (or just sitting, whatever floats your boat) among plates of cookies is my kind of night. And my kind of cavorting.

cookie case

They had at least 13 kinds of cookies when we were there, so I'd compare it to one of those "gazillion cupcake flavors" bakeries but with cookies instead. I think I'd rather go for cookies since they're cheaper and smaller, thus allowing the eater (me) to consume a wider variety of them in one visit.

Carol ordered a plate of three cookies (snickerdoodle, chocolate mint, and oatmeal blueberry cranberry and a cup of tea) while I, while struggling to decide, went for the specials (chocolate chip walnut and oatmeal scotchies). We shared all the cookies and came to the conclusion that while they were all great (soft and chewy, and I don't think I need to describe the flavors since they tasted like their names, except for the snickerdoodle, which while being on the best cookies in the world has a name that doesn't give any hint at what it tastes like, which might add to it's greatness, and this was a really poorly constructed sentence), they weren't amazingly great (not that we were expecting amazingly good-ness). My favorite cookie was the chocolate mint, which Carol found too sweet for her tastes (oh, I laugh at the thought...BWAHAHA...oh crap, now I have diabetes). What I love about the cookies is that they're a good size (not jumbo, which is how I usually like my cookies, and not tiny "by the pound" cookies, which I kind of hate) and feel very fresh and home-made. Of course, you could wonder why I don't just bake my own cookies, but I think I've already expounded upon the problem of me baking or cooking in my dorm, and if not...I'll do it later.

I'd definitely go back to Milk & Cookies for a cozy place to sit and enjoy some cookies with a friend. It's not a place I'd feel like going by myself but I'd love to make it a weekly (or perhaps monthly would be more reasonable) meeting place with Carol.

To exemplify a bakery I would go to myself for the sake of trying a variety of baked goods that I'll ultimately become addicted to and cry out the names of during my darkest nightmares as they add to my subcutaneous layer of fat, I went to Moishe's Bake Shop yesterday afternoon around lunchtime (after eating Japanese curry at JAS Mart). If you're from NYC, you'll know that it was rainy and windy. Factor in my "ball of phlegm" feeling while trying to orient my umbrella (with one broken hinge) to make best use of its rain-blocking properties (yes, that's what they're supposed to do, unlike hitting other pedestrians in the face, which is what they tend to do), I stared at the ginormous window glowing with golden pastries radiating the promise of Kosherliciousness and latched onto these babies.

chocolate cigars

When I say babies, I mean gigantic freak babies, like "THE 20 POUND BABY THAT TERRORIZED THE HOSPITAL AND ATE THE OTHER BABIES." I'm pretty sure the woman in the bakery told me they were "chocolate cigars". What kind of cigar is that? The "Instant-Ephymsema" variety? Hm. Well. I had no expectations and IT WAS SO GOOD, OH YES IT WAS. Layers of dense, rolled up flaky dough with chocolate splodged in between and drizzled on top; it just can't be bad. I had to carry it around for about 7 hours before getting to eat it since i didn't have time; it nearly killed me. (Of course, I'm sure eating the chocolate log didn't increase my life expectancy either.)

But back to bakeries. I met up with Carol to celebrate her 21st birthday in the best way we know how: FOOD. It's not the best was as much as the only way I know. (scratches head) Anyway, after Milk & Cookies we headed down to Jacques Torres Chocolate Haven since it's awesome and it was close by. Strangely perhaps, I wasn't in the mood for much (yes, GASP!), but I still walked out with a milk chocolate brulee bar, which I shall comment on later since I haven't actually eaten it yet. Carol got three of four bars, something I couldn't do because I have the ability to eat 100 grams of chocolate in one sitting with ease (until later, at which point I'll probably shout, "I ATE ALL THAT CHOCOLATE AT ONCE, HOLY CRAP?!").

And then...silence. Where off to next? We went to Once Upon a Tart thinking it might be closed and the empty cases told us that yes, tarts were not to be part of our stomach contents for the night.

NOW WHAT? WHERE CAN WE GO IN NYC AT NIGHT? OH MY GOD, PASTRIES?! HUUH MUHH *foams at the mouth*...

Well, there are a gazillion places in NYC, such as the 24 hour Veselka! I brought Carol there (after first taking a look at Bruno Bakery on LaGuardia Place, a bakery I've been inside a few times yet have never actually eaten anything from) to look at their small but appealing bakery case. We were going to sit on a bench outside the nearby church when the glowing innards (yes, innards) of Black Hound...glowed in our direction.

"Wanna check it out?"

"...what kind of question is that?"

little cakes

They have loads of little cakes in the front window. AIEEE. And inside...

tarts and stuff

...were lots of tarts. They also sell truffles and cookies, all of which look very tempting. However, the tempting factor of the bakery is, in my opinion, seriously downplayed by the lack of environment. It almost reminds me of an empty apartment, except that it's full of pastries and sweets (not that NYC apartments need help selling, but people would swarm all over a listing like "APARMENT, FURNISHED WITH BAKED GOODS", or at least I would, while ignoring that the apartment has no ceiling or running water). It's not like the selection is sparse, but for whatever reason I can't shake off the "just moved in" feeling. If anyone's been there, maybe you can tell me if I'm odd (no, wait, I know the answer to that already).

apple ginger tart

Carol and I shared an apple ginger tart, which I kept mistakingly calling a pie. It looks like a little pie, right? We wondered what the difference between pies and tarts were, but didn't come to many conclusions after eating our pie-esque tart. This doesn't help much either. The tart was awesome, with a pronounced ginger taste and a great crust that wasn't too thick, hard, soft...er, basically there was nothing wrong with this tart and it was way above average. It was hardy enough that we could split it in half and each our portions with our hands--oh yes, we epitomize sophisticated eating.

We ended our fooding for the night at this point since our diet for the night consisted of cookies, tarts, and chocolate. I didn't actually eat any chocolate but since I got her a box of chocolates from Kee's Chocolates, she ate some of those.

Ooh, Kee's, how I adore you. I went in during my lunch break since freshly made chocolates aren't something you can buy in advance (or they shouldn't be able to last that long; there's no need for Godiva in NYC). The first (and previous) time I went to the store was in the spring to buy a box of chocolates for my mum's birthday. When I walked in, Kee was stirring what looked like a pan of almond slivers and caramel, which created a heavenly scent that you can imagine almost made my head explode (you know, the good kind of explosion). When I walked in this time, another woman (who was there last time also; I guess it's just a two-person operation) was popping creme brulee truffles out of their hexagonal molds.

new batch of creme brulee truffles

Their creme brulee truffles encase a liquidy, creamy vanilla filling in a delicately thin, crunchy dark chocolate shell. Quite beautiful. But of course, not every piece comes out perfectly, especially considering their fragility. What happens to pieces that don't make the final cut?

THEY FEED THEM TO PEOPLE LIKE ME! Yes, I am the human chocolate disposal; fill me up. I had tried the creme brulee truffle once before, when I unsuccessfully tried to eat just half of it to take a look at the insides (you're best off eating the whole thing at once because it's very runny). This time I popped it in my mouth and crunched down. There isn't a comparable sensation to the mixing of crisp chocolate shards and creamy vanilla filling that comes to my mind, so I'll just say that it's really good. Reeeeaally good. Go buy one, now, preferably when they're making one and might possibly get a defect. I got another "defected" champagne truffle, which while not nearly as enjoyable as the creme brulee (hello, non-alcohol lover speaking here), was still good. I'm not going to refuse free chocolate!

Besides the free truffles, I bought a chocolate turtle for myself. I prefer nut-caramel-cluster-y things to truffles, maybe because they're more mishmashed and eating perfectly constructed truffles and bon bons makes me feel like I'm destroying works of art with my digestive juices.

turtle innards

It's a good thing I take photos of things as it's the only way I can slow down my eating. See the caramel chocolate nut-ness? Yeah? Good. [Continues to eat the other half in about 2 seconds.]

I could say more, but I'm tired. Keep in mind that I was sick all day (Carol said she was also sick) yet that didn't make any impact on my eating. How much do you want to bet that that'll so bite me in the bum over the weekend? I'm going to an Interpol concert on Sunday, so I'd like to be functional.

Oh...sweets.