The Girl Who Ate Everything

My crappy writing brings you closer to THE LINKS!

Seriously, I need to work on my writing skills, starting now. Or perhaps in 10 minutes. Actually, they're not worthy of being"skills"—maybe "skillz" is better. Has anyone noticed that "skills" is "kills" with an s? KILLING SKILLS? WHAAT?

...wow, I destroyed this post already. Anyhoo, I shall plod on. [recomposes self]

I should have mentioned this earlier, but for Dine & Dish #4, Becks & Posh organized all the Around the World in $40 Days Rachel Ray-esque fooding itineraries. I'm not sure if my entry was the cheapest (in America at least; I can't beat India!), but I'm quite cheap. As I read through the entries, I feel a growing desire to EAT THE ENTIRE WORLD.

That's bad, by the way. Or at least it's not normal. "FEMALE, 20, EATS WORLD!" Yup. Fright.

Sweating is good for you! I agree, somewhat. But considering I'm sweating right now and all I'm doing is sitting in front of my computer, typing (my room isn't that hot) with the teeniest bit of physical exertion and not much brain activity to boot, I'm rather disturbed that my fluids are escaping through my pores. I'm turning into humain au jus, and not a tasty one at that. But perhaps all the sweat is a good thing, figuring I don't become a smelly drippy human feared by all within a 20 foot radius.

Dear Monsanto: once again, you suck! Good job. Tom Philpott of Bitter Greens Journal gets a notice from Monsanto regarding his column called "Roundup, ready", as it sounds too close to Monstanto's Roundup Ready® and weakens the name. I don't deny that Monsanto has the right to take action against Mr. Philpott, but...come on, are you kidding me? This makes them look rather stupid. "ZOMG, this blog used our trademark! Now they must pay! WITH THEIR SOULS!"

The documentary The Future of Food is coming out soon. Let's go!

On a totally unrelated (but you know, still food related) matter, what's up with this Play & Freeze Ice Cream Maker? Toss around a big ball that makes ice cream? Sounds rather neat, figuring it works.

Have you ever gotten a loaf of bread and lamented, "Godammit, why must my bread have crust? WHERE DID MY LIFE GO WRONG?" Well, Hovis has got the wheat product for you: Invisible Crust (and a slick website to go along with it)! Wow, that sounds magical! Come on, the crust is freakin' INVISIBLE! Is your crust invisible? No? Well you can continue to eat your inferior visible-crusted bread or move to England and get some of the invisible stuff. I think that means the crust just never forms, but it sounds like it does form, yet you can't see it. Like it's on some other wavelength that only dogs can see. Or something. Yes. Personally, crust is one of my favorite parts, so this "invisible crust" would not make me happy. I'd demand un-invisible invisible crust.

Celebrities eat food! Hot diggity! I thought they were robots all this time that harnessed the power of space rocks.

Lastly, Manila is freakin' killing me. Go Nuts Donuts are adorable. Yes, we have donuts in NYC, but these look more appealing, for some reason. Has anyone noticed the recent Dunkin' Donuts explosion lately? As in, over this past year? For insance, one opened up in my small hometown and while walking around NYC I've seen "DUNKIN' DONUTS / BASKIN ROBBINS COMING SOON, HIDE YOUR BABIES" signs around (well, they said something like that).

As for something non-link related, today I had my first class of junior year in "beverages", aka "alcoholic drink tasting class". We tried white wine today and let me tell you...I really dislike alcohol. If I ever wondered what something fruit would taste like if it had no sweetness and made me want to retch and smelled like a rotting something or other, I've found it. I know there are sweet wines (as in, not dry; whoa, I learned one new wine terminology) but I doubt I'll like those either. The worst part wasn't swishing the wine in my mouth (while sucking in air for aeration, whoa), but after I spit it out (into my styrofoam cup "spittoon") and having the wine taste linger in my mouth, seemingly forever as it lodged itself into ever crevice of my tasting cavity, a place I like to reserve for food I enjoy, which wine is not. Taste buds wept, tear ducts expelled...well, tears. I don't know what else you expect to come out of them.

Time to read "Wine for Dummies."